Ah, the joys of pregnancy.

I'm getting increasingly large and clumsy. My back aches constantly and I have a burning pain right below my right breast - I'm told it's a combination of the baby pressing up against me and a uterine fibroid that I unfortunately have in that area. I get up about three times a night to pee, and find it hard to get comfortable in bed, despite the aid of pillows and cushions. My poor partner has been banished temporarily to the other bedroom, as I find I need to sleep diagonally across the bed with my legs out in an L-shape in order to get any measure of pain relief.

My social life is cactus. I was invited to an opening night on Friday and had to decline at the last minute, due to simply being unable to leave the sofa. I now generally communicate with friends by email and facebook. My wardrobe has been confined to long t-shirts and cardigans, with a couple of plain maternity dresses for variety - they're all styles I'd turn my nose up at normally. Being short, I'm usually a high-heel queen, but these days I find myself only able to wear a single pair of low-heeled sandals with thick soles, circa 2001. Bor - ring.

And my arse? Don't get me started....

On the plus side, I feel like I am starting to really commune with my baby. I talk to him sometimes and I know he hears me, as he responds with thumps. I am recognising the patterns in his waking and sleeping (you guessed it - he wakes when I am sleeping). And I am really feeling him within me as a person, rather than as a thing, if that makes any sense.

So now I have eight weeks to go. Onwards (and outwards).