I'm a 42yo online communications & IT consultant, and ex recording artist, from Melbourne, Australia.

After much searching, I finally met the right man. Then I got pregnant at 41 - baby boy was due 20 April 2010.

It was to be quite a journey. We discovered via ultrasound that our baby had some health problems, namely a hole in the heart, hypospadias and IUG growth issues.

Then I became very ill with pre-eclampsia, and was admitted to hospital at 34 weeks gestation.

Our baby Charles was delivered prematurely on 16th March 2010 weighing a tiny 1460g (3.5 pounds). He spent a month in hospital before coming home.

Being pregnant - the real story...

I know pregnancy is a joy and all. And at my age, I'm extremely lucky. But when I hear mothers saying how wonderful they felt when pregnant and so on, I can't help thinking that only half the story is being told.

I DO think of pregnancy as a miracle, and feel thankful every day.

But I have also found it somewhat uncomfortable and burdensome - and extremely stressful.

Here's what happened during my pregnancy:

  • At six weeks I had an ultasound by a junior radiologist, who told me he thought the foetus was positioned incorrectly, too close to my fallopian tubes, and that it may be ectopic. I had to wait five agonising days before we found out this wasn't the case.
  • I was sick - horrible, retching, incapacitating sick - for more than 4 months.
  • I struggled and struggled with work. I was on a consulting job I was contracted through my company to deliver, and there was no escape.
  • I experienced spotting and bleeding during the first three months. One large bleed had me racing to the obstetrician, convinced I was miscarrying.
  • I opted to have a CVS at 12 weeks, due to my age. This turned out to be somewhat lengthy and traumatic, as my doctor had difficulty getting a sample from my placenta. I discovered I was having a boy and that his chromosomes were all in the right place.
  • At 18 weeks I was still occasionally throwing up, and struggling with work.
  • At 20 weeks we discovered baby was not growing as he should be - see this earlier post.
  • At 24 weeks we discovered baby had a hole in his heart - see this earlier post.
  • My nose is constantly blocked and I get HEAPS of nosebleeds. It's incredibly debilitating.
  • And now, at 31 weeks? I'm enduring the usual uncomfortable nights, gastric reflux, tiredness and backaches. Not to mention being scanned weekly, having to be assessed by a cardiologist and being constantly warned that baby may have to be delivered earlier than planned. And I'm fearful about the surgery and stress that awaits my little boy once he is born.
So yes, pregnancy is a miracle and I feel blessed.

But is it an enjoyable experience? I'm not 100% sure about that one...


Jayne said...

Oh you have had such a tough time. I really really hope that the payoff will be an easy birth and for everything to work out well for your son. xxx

So Now What? said...

No, I would say this experience is not 100% enjoyable. Sorry you've had such a shite run. x

april said...

You have had a much rougher time than most. I too have the horrid nausea through most of the preganancy, and had to spend most of the last one in bed, due to 'irritable uterus" (don't ask me, no idea - just know it hurt and risked misscarridge) and had that threat over my head the entire time.
I would love to have been or be one of those pregnant women tou see striding through parks, proudly and easily carring their new bump before them - but i wonder now how much of that is just ppearence and how maybe they are stiding so fast because they have to get back to home / office to be sick or lie down...
Pregancny was not fun and you are doing SO well.

Taryn Rucci said...

Let me just say, I am the worlds worst pregnant lady. I just do not cope well with being pregnant. I find it a huge burden, suffered terribly with back problems, nausea, exhaustion.. the list is endless. But just think about how wonderful it will be to hold your little man in your arms. Then all these problems you have experienced will be a million miles away.

You have had a terribly difficult pregnancy but there are SO MANY good times ahead!


41BabyProject said...

Thanks everyone :-) Lest you all think I do nothing but complain, I have had some moments of striding proudly and confidently through the streets looking fabulous. I have also much to be thankful for and look forward to meeting my little boy very soon :-)

Megan said...

You're allowed to complain. Growing a baby can be a difficult thing, and you've definitely been through a lot during your pregnancy.

But yes, there will be some amazing times ahead of you. It's all worth it. Although you'll still want to complain sometimes, and that's OK too. xo

Kallie said...

You've not had a dream pregnancy but let's hope once your son is born it will all fade into the background and you'll get the dream then :)

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